th-54Monty Roberts, famous for his way with horses and author of ‘The Man Who Listens to Horses’, can transform a scared, flight animal into a trusted ally who will allow itself to be saddled and ridden.

 Monty works on the principle that all relationships can be based on a spirit of co-operation and empathy and that all that is required is to take the time and have the patience to learn the other’s language, instead of brashly imposing one’s own.  

Left to its own devices, the wild colt would simply stay wild.


Humans, on the other hand, too often avoid the family member, colleague or acquaintance they are not comfortable around. Instead of ‘spending time in the yard with them’, they avoid them at all costs with the naïve hope that things will get better all by themselves.

Indeed, we humans, when confronted with many of life’s problems, turn a blind eye rather than face the discipline required to analyse the problem and develop considered and workable solutions.

Again, the hope is that problems will go away of their own accord.  However, unresolved problems do not go away; they remain a barrier to personal growth – not taking responsibility for our part in the problem is the cause of the problem.

In my coaching sessions with clients, who believe they are facing significant challenges, I support them through analyzing what they can actually do about it as opposed to feeling like powerless victims. Helping them understand that they do have choices and can exercise those choices is the first step in moving forward.

Recently I read Suzy Welch’s book, The Rule of 10 – 10 – 10, which invites us to make non-emotional, informed and intelligent decisions based on considering, ‘How will making this decision impact my life in the next ten minutes, ten months or ten years?”

Too often we avoid making the decision because the ‘ten minute’ pain seems too much to bear.  It is only when we challenge ourselves to look out to ten months and then ten years, are we able to see and think more clearly.

Ask yourself if you are simply ignoring any problems or people at the moment. If you are finding it difficult to discipline yourself to deal with the issues, then I know a great coach who can help you.  Just send me an email to and I’ll give you a call.


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